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Similarly, Carver notes that the Loser doesn’t have to exhibit all of the symptoms listed below to be dangerous.The presence of even three of these symptoms indicates a potentially harmful relationship.
You’ll receive gifts, a variety of promises, and be showered with their attention and nice gestures.” Drew Peterson and other dangerous seducers wouldn’t get any partners, much less attractive young women, if they showed their true colors from the very beginning. They deluge their targets with flattery, promises and gifts at the beginning of the relationship.
Such outbursts also train the partners to become gradually habituated to acts of violence. They also engage in long-term relationships, however, to gain more lasting control over certain more promising targets.
It’s nearly impossible to control strong human beings who have clear boundaries and a healthy self-esteem.
He began with criticism, went on to name-calling and moved on to physical violence and (probably) murder. “The Loser,” Carver notes, “has very shallow emotions and connections with others.
It’s very important to get away from a Loser at the slightest hint of violence, including verbal aggression, since abuse usually increases in frequency and severity over time. One of the things that might attract you to the Loser is how quickly he or she says ‘I Love You’ or wants to marry or commit to you.
As Carver observes, “The Loser feels your friends and family might influence you or offer negative opinions about their behavior…